Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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