For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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