Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
