Fine. I'll sleep in my office
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Randomize
