you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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