I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
