he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
