She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
