Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
We left the knife in your bed.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
