can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
