Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
