btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
