You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Blood and glitter go together right?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
