ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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