xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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