chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
