found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Randomize
