hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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