That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i barfeds in our rink
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
