ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
