We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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