Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize