***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
