my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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