Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
