I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
