This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
