I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
