There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Farmville is her only friend.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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