i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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