She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
We don't watch enough power rangers
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
