I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
