no. you can't hotbox the world.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
