I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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