He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
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