Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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