Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
