I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize