do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
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