The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
