Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
