And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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