ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
