So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
