i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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