I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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