i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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