i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize