that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
