We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
