But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Randomize
